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Long-term Relationships: Riding The Rollercoaster Of Life Together

Updated: Apr 26

The Rollercoaster Of Long-term Relationships
Problems and solutions in a long-term relationship

Like every other progression maintaining a Long-term relationship or LTR needs work, read on to learn how to do it successfully.

We have all grown up watching romantic movies where the end is always happily ever after, but those movies always end just at the wedding or proposal. Nobody wanted to show how both partners were deeply engrossed in their chores and stress after a long term. In our minds (as kids), long-term relationships were ‘happily ever after’ etched by the fantastic world of movies, though the real world presented a different picture. Many families had issues while kids were growing up, and the kids were confused about the existence of long-term relationships. They do exist, however different than the way our fantasies project. Just like every other progression, maintaining a long-term relationship needs work, and we will discuss the same in this post.

Meaning of Long-term relationship

The intent to commit for a long term is enough as a first step. You do not know about future problems, but you are ready to face them with your partner, which means the beginning of a long-term relationship. You would spend some time dating, proposing, marrying, or starting living together. All these steps will take years, and before you realize it, you are already in a long-term relationship. I am putting it in a positive light and making it sound easy, but sometimes you will face hiccups at all or some steps while moving forward. Generally, when a relationship is full of trust and commitment and goes above a year can be termed as a long-term relationship or LTR.

Problems in Long-term relationships

Long-term relationships have various positive aspects and make life comfortable. When you have LTR with a person you love, you are motivated and enjoy life to the fullest. With time LTR needs work to go on smoothly as eventually issues and differences crop up. You may be facing some or all of them while in an LTR. We will discuss the problems faced by LTR couples and their probable solutions.

Accumulated differences

When you live with someone for a long time, you are bound to have differences. Most of the time, these differences are swept under the carpet. A time comes when all the differences become accumulated, and they turn into huge arguments. If the arguments are handled well, it will build a stronger relationship, if stretched too much or not resolved, complicated situations will arise.

There will be differences and arguments. Do not try to sweep things under the carpet or ignore them. Talk out when the differences crop up, which will give you an idea as to how to navigate through the differences. E.g. If one of you is vegan, none of you should try to change the other. Food is a basic necessity, and changing that requires changes in our core and habits. Both of you can continue with your choice of food.

Taken for granted

You have become comfortable with and know each other well, but you take each other for granted. There is no more asking about choice in something and a guarantee that the other will oblige to your demand. 

Both of you like to socialize, and a friend asked you for a weekend meet-up. You agreed to it without asking your partner. Your LTR partner could have prior plans, or some work to do, or not be in the mood to go. A call to your partner before agreeing to go would save a lot of time and grief.

No element of surprise

You have come to a stage where you can complete each other’s sentences. While this becomes very convenient, the element of surprise is gone. Every relationship will feel great when there is some mystery associated with it. It can be a minute act, but significant enough to make you less predictable for your partner.

Learn a new skill, be it together or on your own. It will bring remarkable changes to the way you think and act. Introducing anything new will revive your personality and your LTR with your partner. There could be something you wanted to learn for a long time, do it now.

Parents only

Those couples in LTR who are also parents face various problems. One of them is that they coexist only as parents and not as a couple. Becoming parents is one of the happiest moments of life, and you are dedicated parents who look after your kids well. It should not mean not to give time to your relationship as a couple.

Go out on date night, or go for a vacation together if you can arrange good care for your kids. Going out will solve the problem to some extent. You can go on vacations occasionally, but for everyday life, you need to find smart solutions. Go for small gestures that you do not do every day, or you used to do during the initial days of the relationship. E.g., leaving little love notes, or buying flowers. Even small gestures will go a long way to strengthen your long-term relationship. If you still feel overwhelmed, contact Online Relationship Counseling.

Dull sex life 

One of the most important aspects of a couple’s relationship is a good sex life. If the couple does not have a good sex life, arguments will crop up, though the excuses would be trivial. Most people think talking about sex is boring as opposed to getting into the action. If your sex life has become dull, do something about it before things turn south.

Sex is as much a mental experience as it is physical. Your brain is stimulated during the act, and the physical pleasure results from your mental satisfaction. Try new techniques, both in and out of your bedroom which make your sex life better. Contact a sex therapist or a sexologist if the problem persists.

Final Word

LTR, or Long-term relationship, is a fascinating journey if you find a suitable partner. It has its ups and downs, but what is the thrill of a straight ride? Go into a long-term relationship, if you and your partner are committed to each other and in sync. If you are going through challenges in a long-term relationship, get in touch with experts at The Love Manual for Online Relationship Counseling.

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