Young age is simple. You meet someone, you play with them and you start calling them friends. Adulthood on the other hand mostly sticks to acquaintances. We all need friends to share the best and worst moments of our lives. We want social relationships and acquaintances play an important role in any social circle.
Over the years, our friends shifted to different places, scattered around the world. We do talk to them and try to stay connected. Even if our long-distance friendship is going well, we still need some friends in the vicinity. This applies more so when you shift to a new place. I got an experience of this recently as I shifted to a new place. It has lots of interesting people and many of them are my acquaintances. We meet at social events, festivals, and other celebrations. I really have a good time when I meet them and go back home happy.
At some point in time, I started to wonder whether I would have good friends here. Thankfully, I found a few friends, and some bitter experiences too. All are part of social relationships🤷. This process leads to this post and if you are among people who want acquaintances to turn into friends, read on further.
Social relationships and acquaintances
Simple pointers to navigate acquaintances and take the pressure off social relationships.
Spend time
It is obvious that you need to spend time with your acquaintances to form friendships. The real question is how much time is required? I read once that you need to spend 200+ hours with someone to get to know them better 🕰️. Once you know them, you can decide whether you want to be friends or just stick to acquaintanceship.
Help thy acquaintances
Helping your acquaintances would be a good start 🤝. It will make you feel good about yourself, earn you some good karma, and increase your chances of friendship with others. Helping others will make it easier to expect and ask for help when you need it.
Invite them over
Invite your acquaintances for tea/ coffee ☕ or something like that. You all can get more comfortable by meeting in a casual setting which may lead to a time with lots of fun and laughter. You may also get invited by someone while you have
invited others.
Make plans together
You must be thinking why make plans with acquaintances, don’t we do it with friends? Yeah, mostly we go out for salon visits 💆 💆, movies, or shopping with friends. But going out together with acquaintances could be fun and you may end up repeating those activities together. You will spend time together but will be free of hosting duties as it is not your home and someplace outside.
Also read: Forming and Navigating Adult Friendships
Acquaintances to friends
Some people think that sharing secrets with your friends makes the bond stronger. I feel that we don’t have many secrets, just personal stuff. Sharing it makes us vulnerable as we open ourselves up. Go gradually from waving 👋 to sharing personal stuff to form a lasting friendship.
Sharing thoughts
Sharing thoughts about various subjects would be a good conversation starter. These need not be about your personal stuff. It can be about the weather, the latest sales, coming festivals, general discussions about education(not your kids’ grades), and so on.
This will give you a general idea about the thought process of your acquaintances. Obviously, not all thoughts would be the same but, if you like the person regardless of the similarity of opinions, could strike up a good friendship.
Sharing memories
By this time, you should be able to trust the person enough to share some good memories, funny anecdotes, hobbies, etc. Sharing good memories is easier than painful ones. The painful memories expect a certain response from the listener and if that response is not per your standards, you will feel you opened up too early 🫤.
Sharing personal experiences
Once you are done with sharing funny and good things, it is time to get to your darker side 😈. Just kidding, you can share some personal stuff. You can get some opinion of your acquaintance turned friend on a problem. You can also expect some honest answers to your questions. Friends are honest, acquaintances are polite. You may also share your future plans or dreams, and your friend shares their dreams with you. If you share a bad experience, you can now expect a proper response, even to the point of criticizing that person or situation 😜.
End-Note
Whether you are new to a place, or living in the same place for years, it is undeniable that you will have some good experiences with people. Some people move on pretty quickly and form new friendships, while others have to try hard to trust people again. Introverts, extroverts, omniverts, ambiverts, and all types of people need friends. Go out, go on, and have some fun with your friends or acquaintances. If you had traumatic experiences in the past from people posing as friends or any social relationships, go for online counseling with The Love Manual.
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